There are basically two types of scams when it comes to mail order brides. The first one involves the internet-dating site itself, or the marriage agency, or whatever term they use to describe themselves. Some of these sites are out to get as many men to pay for memberships as possible and then disappear into cyberspace with all the money.

Agency/Website Scams

Many of the women who are listed with these sites will have no idea what the site owner is really up to and are completely innocent of any wrongdoing. On the other hand, these sites often use women who don’t even exist, or who aren’t foreign at all, or who have no idea their picture is on a dating site.

The way to protect yourself against sites like this is to do some research before you decide to sign up with a particular site. Look for reviews, visit forums, and see if you discover other people who have encountered problems with the site in the past.

Other steps you can take include:

• Looking for sites that require a photograph. Without a photo, you have no idea who you might be dealing with. And be leery of pictures in suggestive poses or those wearing provocative clothing. Those are the ones most likely to be trying to get your attention for the wrong reasons.

• Staying away from huge sites with tens of thousands of women, as well as tiny sites with less than 500. You’ll almost always be better off at a mid-size site with 2,000-4,000 hopeful women.

• Find out what ‘extra’ services the agency is charging you for. Your best bet is with a site that charges a flat monthly fee.

• Be sure the profile pictures look like ‘real’ women and be suspicious of a site where all the women are drop-dead gorgeous ‘model’ types.

• Do some research to see if the site has had complaints from previous members.

Individual Scams

The other type of scam you could run into is from the supposed mail order bride herself. Unfortunately, you’re probably more likely to experience this type of scam than the first one. It tends to happen more often on large dating sites, because they’re able to blend in better, and because a large site gives them even more men to target.

The way to protect yourself against this type of scam is to know what to look for so you can recognize when it happens. Now, you should know that the majority of women who are on these international dating sites, or mail order bride sites, are genuinely seeking a marriage minded man and have no intention of scamming them or taking advantage of them in any way.

It’s the few who do that you must guard against.

Once you learn what to look for, it makes it much easier to spot these women who want nothing more from you than the money you’re willing to part with. Generally, they show their hand early in the relationship, but some scammers can be very patient, sometimes waiting several months before they play their hand. They’ve heard the rumors that all Americans are rich, and they just want to find some unsuspecting man who’s willing to share his ‘wealth’.

They know that while $50, $75, or $100 may not be a huge amount to you, for her it may be the equivalent to a week’s pay or more.With the average monthly salary in Russia roughly $640, she only has to find about 10 men willing to give her money to make that much, or even more.

The best advice: Don’t send any money for any reason.

Here are just a few of the ways she may try to make you sympathetic enough to send her money.

1. She tell you she wants to meet you but needs money for airline tickets, a travel visa and/or travel expenses. This is a classic scam that many men have been taken in by.

2. She’ll send you an email saying she can’t pay for translation and ask you to pay for it.

3. You’ll try to buy airline tickets, either for yourself or for her, from a travel agency she recommends and you don’t realize it’s a fake agency.

4. She’s had an accident and needs money – to pay for car repairs, hospital bills, expenses while she’s out of work, etc.

5. She’s lost her job, had to quit school, mother needs an operation…the list and the creativity goes on and on.

The bottom line is, to protect yourself from being scammed, do proper research on a site before you choose one, and don’t send money to a prospective bride for any reason.

nion, appearance of the bride will depend on how the make-up is to a great extent. You see, bride symbolizes purity?elegance, nobleness and any other clear words you could use to describe her. As one of the important day in the life, featuring beautiful while decorous should be concerned by all brides. Though you have to appear not too strange comparing other ones, you still can make yourselves distinctively eye-catching. Here I will present four tips to promote your make-up. Utterly the magic key to bride-to-be. false Eyelashes In fact, as the most vivid part of your face, eyelashes are greatly good at catching others’ attention. How common eyelashes can achieve it? Well, what you need to do is just take advantage of exaggerated style to highlight your eyesight. You might select as well. False eyelashes with rhinestone detail. You’’ find it’s easy to make yourselves uniquely. White Eyes Shadow On the wedding day, all things always have relation with white color including the eyes shadow. White eyes shadow can perfectly fit the romantic air, even add much more dignity to your white dress. For Asian brides, remember that you’d better prevent from spreading in a large area. Just simply outline your eyes with eyeliner pens and especially highlight the canthus. Nail Polish I think that would be better if you choose white nail polish to fit your white wedding dress. Especially for those who are addicts of simple style. If you consider that you go through the motions with simple style, you are totally wrong. In fact, the fussy nail would steal spotlight of the ring which is the leading actor on that day. See the model in Chanel fashion show. She looks wonderful with chic nail, isn’t it? While if you are a chinese bride, I’m afraid that the white nail polish couldn’t meet your needs. Since I deeply know that almost all Chinese people are addicts of red color, I suggest the red nail polish to you. White Hair Ornament Your hairstyle is really one important detail what should not be neglected. What we can do to make it special while gorgeous? Of course, it shouldn’t be pursuing height and complexity of it. See the picture where I collected from Karl Lagerfeld Show. Simple hairstyle with delicate white hair ornament, making the whole style vividly at once. Providing you wear mantilla, that would features gleaming. Also you could select arm ornament which is of the same style just like the hair one.

Life is not a bed of roses and the same can be said about relationships. It would be unwise to expect the emotions between various individuals to remain at the same, steady level at all points of time and disagreements are bound to arise. In addition, when anger or jealousy raises its ugly head, then all love seems to fly out of the window. At times like this, we need a balancing effect to smooth out the ruffled feathers of the quarrelling couple. The ancient Chinese practice of Feng Shui can help in creating perfect harmony in every personal relationship, besides other aspects of life like health, wealth and career. Feng Shui love tips if properly implemented can help to balance the yang (male) and yin (female) energies and bring the elements in perfect harmony with each other.

Feng shui love principles can be applied for any situation, whether you are a single person waiting for love to enter your life, or even if you are already in a relationship with a partner and are looking for ways and means to enhance the bond. The south west area of our living space defines the personal relationship area and Feng shui love tips work towards enhancing that aspect of our lives. Colors like passionate red and pink in our bedroom or the southern area of the house help to bring the loved ones closer to each other. It is also advisable to keep a pair of mandarin ducks in the bedroom where the couple sleeps. It helps to bring about greater love and understanding among the partners.

If you want to attract love into your life you could try having peonies in your house. If the real flowers are not available, a photograph of the same will do equally well. However, peonies can cause infidelity in the case of married couple, so it is best avoided in that case. Hanging clear crystals in the south corner of the living room can also bring about harmony among the various members of the family. Certain precious and semi precious stones like pink quartz also have relationship enhancing qualities and they also look appealing when worn on the wrist as a charm. It can also be the ideal gift for your girlfriend when you want her to be in your life forever.

Simple things like the décor and furnishings of the house can also make a deep impression on your mindset and the related behaviour. In order to promote harmony among family members, it is important that the furnishings in the living room and bedroom have round and soft edges rather than hard and pointed ones. Choose soft colors like soothing pink for your bedroom and light scented candles and incense sticks in the house to ensure the flow of chi (energy) smoothly among the many rooms. An important point to be considered while implementing any Feng Shui tip is that it should be done only under the guidance of an experienced professional. Keeping this in mind you can safely implement Feng Shui love tips to build harmonious and loving relationships in your life.

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As a webmaster of a Filipina Penpal and dating site, I’m amazed at some member’s relationship mentality. For whatever reason, they view online dating as a jump from meeting to instant marriage without any courtship. This is not the road to take for a successful marriage, be it you meet at an online dating site or your local church.

Most initial contact is based on physical attraction. However, I recommend to members of my site to start out as penpals and act accordingly. No sexual innuendos, no promises, no commitments — take your time getting to know each other and see where it leads. Relationships based solely on looks is usually a recipe for disaster. I’m not saying attraction is not important, but it isn’t the sole criterion to sustaining a long and happy marriage. There has to be more to a relationship than the way he or she looks, but also on what he or she has in common.

Online dating to some is an avenue to circumvent the courtship process. They see someone online, exchange a few emails, and instantly declare love. In a traditional dating scenario you don’t usually declare love after a few dates. Why should online dating be any different? The courting process after meeting someone online should be similar to traditional dating. There is an attraction, you exchange emails, and if interest is sparked you flirt, communicate, and even do a version of traditional dating through online chats, phone calls and spending time getting to know each other. Online dating is not an environment where marriage success is magically guaranteed with a “hello” to a “I do” without involving the courting process.

Taking the penpal approach to meeting someone online, may help keep your behavior in check. I’m amazed when a gentleman is flirting with a lady within the first or second email. This person is usually trying to circumvent the courtship process and in doing so is asking for problems. Many who flirt when flirting is not appropriate, is the type of person a hustler is looking for. Keeping your words appropriate for the stage of the relationship you are in and by starting out as penpals, may be your safest and best approach to finding true love.

If you are in a hurry or feel you don’t have time to waste looking for love, you need to rearrange your priorities or in the long run you may waste a lot more time in divorce court or involved with an unhappy marriage. Do yourself a favor — be a penpal first and let the stages of courtship develop naturally. If you are as lucky as I was, not only will you find true love, but also a best friend for life.

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A 19 year old German girl is traveling alone around Australia and New Zealand. She is very well educated and able to express intelligent opinions on a wide variety of topics. Her conversation ranges freely over politics, personal relationships, education, the environment crisis, her future and elsewhere. In all areas she is articulate, open-minded and confident in her view. One day she is asked to clean up the kitchen, but it turns out that she has no idea how to clean up a small space.  She starts to fall in love with an American student but it turns out that she is not brave enough to let him know that she is interested in him. She talks about the career she knows she has to plan but it turns out that she is barely able to think about what she wants, locked by her fear of making a mistake and disappointing her parents. She is so ashamed and afraid of disturbing other people at the dinner table that she has to leave the room when she needs to cough. 

A Chinese student marries his girlfriend because she is pregnant. He is studying a Master’s degree in commerce at university. His mother calls his new wife soon after the wedding and asks her not to put too much pressure on him because he hasn’t finished his studies yet. He has (presumably) self-educated himself how to conceive a baby, but not one person through all his 25 years has educated him on how to handle being a parent. Now that he is going to be a father his own parents still want him protected from real life so he can finish his academic studies.

An American young man is traveling around New Zealand after graduating from high school. When asked what his life goal is he smiles and says he is interested in martial arts, and wants to explore and learn the mysteries of life. He plans to go to university to study anthropology after he completes his travels. When questioned about his choice he is not really sure but thinks it is probably necessary to go to college and says that “Anthropology looks interesting”.  It has no connection whatsoever with his life goal, and will not in any way help him to reach what he wants. Realistically the closest he is likely to come to exploring the mysteries of life is through alcohol, drugs and late-night philosophical discussions.

These young people are real and they are not unusual. They are well educated, intelligent and still hopeful that they have a bright future. They all have excellent potential for success and satisfaction if they find the right direction. They will all be able to work well in any career they choose but they all suffer from one simple problem. They have no idea about life.

I like to picture how they might be if they had had as much life education as they received academic education. I imagine the German girl already enjoying success in her first career – a strong young woman with no need for a man to provide her with emotional support. She is disciplined in her lifestyle (and tidy), full of confidence in action rather than words, and a lot quieter in her opinions. Relationship comes to her much later and she is much happier for it. The Chinese student is happy and not so serious. If his girlfriend gets pregnant (which she probably doesn’t) he quickly comes up with a creative idea for providing for the baby financially without disturbing his studies – probably an internet based business. He is healthy and strong enough to handle the pressure, sleepless nights and additional responsibility. In fact he sees it as a chance to increase his ability to handle life and takes it as a challenge rather than a problem. He has no need whatsoever for interference from his parents. The American man is undergoing a highly disciplined martial arts training and already developing some extraordinary abilities. He is inspired by the possibility of being able to use his training in the future to take on bigger challenges, perhaps learning how to heal incurable diseases or train top athletes in elite performance.

Life’s 4 Living, or at least it should be, but it appears that is only true if you know how to live.

Sarah McCrum

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